I’m dishearten and quite literally depressed over this whole situation. From the senseless killing of a defenseless man to the displaced violence and rage that soon followed. Somehow this naïve boy growing up in the sixties and seventies truly believed that things would get better, that we would eventually learn to stop hating and learn to respect and care for others. I mean, we put a man on the moon for crying out loud. I honestly felt that we as a people would grow out of this arbitrary hate that some people have for each other. But the events over the past week have proven otherwise.
I’m at a loss as to how to approach this. The problem is far more complex than I think anyone wants to admit. Yet again another incident of color that is tearing the fabric of what holds this country together and I confess I feel I’m becoming beat down by it. The names and dates may be different, but the actions and responses are all the same. White man kills a black man and communities explode into wanton violence. Once again, we are polarized into whites and blacks, the haves and the have nots. What I see is a prevailing narrative that on one hand glorifies victimization of one race while shaming and marginalizing another. I see this constant narrative that the problem of racism falls squarely on the shoulders of one race rather than on the community of races we have in this country. Long before George Floyd, long before Rodney King, there has been racial tension not just in this country but throughout the history of mankind. The history of mankind is a history of oppression of one people over another. The ability to hate is afforded to everyone regardless of social status or skin color.
As expected, social media has become flooded with memes and posts depicting not only the victimization of blacks but also chastisement of whites. This latest outrage over a racist cop killing a black man has continued to re-energize the notion that the foundation of this social problem rests upon “white privilege”. There’s been a recirculation of a video with the warning “All whites need to see this”, of a coach lining up his students for a race but before it starts, he asks a variety of questions where a “yes” answer allows two steps forward. The questions are specific to our current social norms and of course most of non-white students are left standing at the original start line while the white students have a significant head start. The whole point of this video is to point out white privilege and how whites are given an unfair advantage over non-whites. I have to be honest a number of the questions that coached asked really didn’t sit well with me. “How many of you grew up with a father and mother?”, “how many of you didn’t sometimes go without food?”, “how many of you didn’t have to help pay the bills?” Trust me I know and empathize that having to endure these things as a child is tragic, but I guess what I need help in understanding is how do the choices made by someone in one community become the fault of someone in a different community? I know that just writing that question will lead some to think I’m turning my back to the plight of the less fortunate but I’m not. Quite the contrary. You can’t be quick to judge my sincerity in expressing sympathy, compassion and willingness to help without first addressing the very real questions of how some communities come to faulter so badly. If you don’t know the problem how can you possibly know the remedy? This is a far more complicated problem than haves and have nots.
I struggle with this whole definition of “privilege”. The dictionary describes it as a special right, advantage, grant or exception given to an individual or group of people. The thing I struggle with is the word “given”. For all that I’ve done and accomplished in life I never had the notion that they were “given” to me. I distinctly remember blood, sweat and tears throughout many of my endeavors. But listening to the rants today, it seems everything I have has been given to me and given to me at the expense of others. Granted I didn’t face many of the stumbling blocks that non-whites have faced. I was fortunate to have both parents raise me. I was fortunate that public schools were available to me. I was fortunate that I didn’t have to grow up with a fear that local police officers were looking to terrorize me. But just because I didn’t have to suffer through those hardships doesn’t mean I didn’t have some of my own. And just because I didn’t have some of those hardships doesn’t mean I’m callous to those who did. But I also don’t see how my good fortune, as it were, is somehow the cause of the adversity others have had to face. I know that’s not necessarily the case but when incidents like the George Floyd incident come up society is quick to make the case that the cause of police violence towards blacks is due to white privilege and given my upbringing, I AM that white privilege.
I would LOVE if racism was completely removed from our culture. But let's just talk about white racism. If white racism was completely removed would things actually get better? If there were no more white racists would that mean in the black communities there would be no more drugs, no more gangs, no more black-on-black violence, no more looting, no more single mothers? Would the removal of all white racism encourage others to take advantage of the opportunities they do have and pursue a better life than what they currently have? Would the elimination of white racism foster a greater sense of generosity and a willingness to help others? I’m not convinced that the removal of one thing will necessitate the emergence of another. First and foremost, racism needs to be destroyed but that's only one battle. There's still a war to be fought. Yes, we need to weed out the bigots in our precincts, boardrooms, loan offices and classrooms. Yes, we need to help promote diversity and inclusion in every aspect of our lives. And yes, we need to constantly examine ourselves for any evidence of even the smallest nuggets of bigotry in our hearts and minds. But this isn’t “we” as in a mandate just for white people. I mean “WE” as in ALL races in this country. We are all guilty and are accountable for the racism we see permeating this country.
I admit, I’m tired, weary and not just a little depressed over this whole thing. I saw and experienced racism firsthand as a child growing up in Maryland and Virginia. I've seen the hate in people and I personally know what it's like to be afraid for my wellbeing because of the color of my skin. But I grew up listening to artists like Marvin Gaye asking, “What’s Going On?”, hopeful for a better tomorrow. But tragically, after 50 years nothing has really changed. We’re all still asking what’s going on but finding no answers.
I’m saddened because I’m not allowed to grieve. I’m not allowed to grieve over the treatment of my fellow citizens and the loss of the ideals to which I thought this country was built upon. My heart breaks when I see shattered innocence on the faces of young children who truly fear for their lives. Instead I’m bombarded by self-appointed social vigilantes who feel it’s their duty, actually their right, to pile on the guilt and shame of being a part of a social class that unfortunately has produced the likes of a number of bigoted police officers. Some say that social media has done much to help bring awareness and enlightenment to this issue of racism but if the past week is any indication I think all social media has done is fanned the flames of anger, bitterness and contempt, with no real intention of actually addressing the problem or providing real solutions. Interesting that neither Martin Luther King Jr. nor Malcom X had the luxury of social media but that didn’t stop them from getting their messages out, convicting the consciousness of an entire nation. But today, social media is swarming with part-time social evangelists. Normally their online lives are consumed with posts of their kids, their recent vacation or their latest outfit. It’s only when a social injustice gets airtime that they lift up their phones and keyboards and engage in a war of rhetoric. They rant all the same things that others are ranting about and will berate those who aren't shouting as loud as they are. The extent of their activism is nothing more than the regurgitation of the latest meme or trying to come up with the next viral hashtag. Activism isn’t just restating the problem over and over. It’s actually about activity working towards change. And perhaps some might say they don’t have the time, that they’re too busy with work or raising a family and that’s all well and good. But, again, activism isn’t about retelling of the injustice or pointing fingers. It’s about influencing positive change. And one way a person can do that is by starting with themselves. Look deep into yourself and be honest enough to admit that you have some prejudice in you. Trust me, we ALL do. You can’t go through life without developing some prejudice based on the experiences you’ve had. That doesn’t make you fundamentally bad, but it does mean you need to be cognizant of your thoughts and beliefs that could be skewed and therefore you need to be ready to make adjustments to what you say and how you act.
We’re a nation with a short attention span, easily distracted by the next shiny, new thing. In a week it’ll be a new political scandal or the decision to further relax the COVID restrictions. Sadly, this incident will drift away into the recesses of our collective minds only to be dusted off and raised to the forefront when another person is killed by a white police officer. But until then, we’ll go back to posting our vacation photos, food likes or self-aggrandizing selfies. The convictions we possessed for that one day in May will be overtaken by our new wants and desires. Once again will go back to being that nation bent on keeping ourselves at the center of the universe, guided by our own subjective moral code, accountable to nothing or no one, unless it gets us more “Likes” or “Followers”.
