I think we're all pretty familiar with the classic resolutions - I want to lose weight, I want to exercise more, I want to travel more, I want to run my first 10K, I want to quit <fill in the blank>. Those are all great resolutions but to be honest they're really only addressing the symptoms of the flaws we have in life rather than the actual problem. And because of that far more resolutions are abandoned rather than achieved.
I'll be honest I haven't made a new year's resolution in years. It's not that I think I don't have anything I need work on. Trust me, there's a lot under my hood that needs a fixin'. I just realized some time ago that it seems most of my previous resolutions were geared towards resolving the superficial elements of my life rather than any root cause. Now I pretty much have only one resolution that I carry forward every year - to love more today than I did yesterday.Ok, before I explain, let me first apologize for putting John Lennon's song, "All You Need is Love", into your head. I know you hear that word "Love" and you immediately think of some sappy, touchy feely, unicorn and glitter image of people prancing around, somewhat reminiscent of the old drug induced Hippy love-in's of the '60s. Nope, I mean something entirely different, although the unicorn and glitter would be kinda cool.
I think the reason that nearly all resolutions fail is that we lack a substantial amount of love, real love in our lives. I'm not just talking about love towards others, but love towards ourselves. I'm not referring to the narcissistic type of love usually expressed in showering oneself with gifts and splashing selfies all over social media. I'm talking about a love that expresses true compassion towards oneself that includes appreciating yourself for who you are and not what someone thinks of you. I'm talking about having the capacity to forgive oneself and to respect oneself rather than constantly apologizing for your own existence. I've said this many times before, you can't be right with anything or anyone if you aren't right with yourself. Hey, God loves you so why don't you?
I'm sure many of us have had a resolution about being nicer to people but we quickly find it's difficult to do. Loving, appreciating and respecting someone else becomes a chore and sometimes a monumental task that we often times look for ways to avoid. Because we fail to love ourselves, the act of loving someone else feels unnatural. Since we don't love ourselves the purpose of loving someone else is only to see how they will react to our expressions towards them. If they don't respond the way we want, we become resentful and bitter and it just reinforces the lie that we are unworthy souls. When you truly love and respect yourself, the ability to love and show compassion towards others becomes as natural as breathing. We don't wait around to see how others will respond. We just move on with our lives, sharing and expressing love and compassion with all we cross paths.
Unfortunately we all fall into the trap of allowing the pains and failures of our past to define who we are. They drive our thoughts and behaviors. We fail to realize that those pains and failures are only experiences, they have NOTHING to do with who we are. Once you start understanding that and accepting that fact you will see what a wonderful person you truly are.
It's ok to forgive yourself and to love yourself. You are a special, unique and glorious creation. Trust me, God don't make no junk. When you can finally see the beauty that's in you, you will naturally express that beauty with those around you. When you love yourself you'll finally believe in yourself and when you believe in yourself, you'll be able to set and achieve real goals that will only bring out the very best of you.
God loves you and so should you!
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