Glad to help...

I'll admit I struggle at times to feel like I'm doing anything worthwhile.  I see so many people flourishing in their careers, making things happen, making a difference.  I know I've chirped about this before and I know there are plenty of other people out there that question their worth from time to time.  It is nice, though, when those random moments come along when you can help someone out, not because there's money or notoriety to be gained but just because it's something that needs to be done and you're in a position to help.  Such a moment presented itself today and I'm really glad I had the opportunity to step up.  I'll be honest, what I did was something I enjoy doing so it wasn't like I had to make some HUGE sacrifice and believe me it wasn't so significant like curing cancer or rescuing orphans from a burning building.  It would be nice if more opportunities like today presented themselves.  It doesn't always have to be something like what I did though.  It could pretty much be anything that's in my wheel house of talents.  Oh, I did NOT just say "wheel house".  Alright, my insecurities are starting to creep in a bit.  I suppose the reason there aren't as many "good will" ops out there is that I probably push them away.  I usually figure I don't have much to offer and therefore don't really look to see where I can be of some help.  When I'm in my comfort zone I can be pretty tenacious when it comes to taking on a challenge.  But I guess it takes real courage to step out of that comfort zone and do something even if I'm a bit lacking in the skills department.  Like someone said, "Life begins at the end of your comfort zone." 

Guess it's time for me to get uncomfortable...

Tough stuff...

I can't help but think our time on this great earth is intended to be a constant struggle.  Now before you start calling me Mr. Cranky Pants, which only my wife can call me that, hear me out.  In the big picture struggle is a good thing.  I know it's hard to feel that way when you're in the thick of things but when you come out on the other side of that altercation, regardless if you're bloodied and bruised, you will always discover a new and better you. 

Runners put in the miles.  Weight lifters pump iron.  Their struggles can be exhausting but the results of their hard work is the creation of a faster and stronger athlete.  Dealing with a difficult person, trying to figure a way out of a financial mess, struggling to overcome an insecurity, they're all examples of situations where we must struggle to overcome and the results, though not always to our liking, will always produce a better version of us. 

I think some folks shy away from struggles.  I guess most of us would prefer to choose the path of least resistance but only through our struggles can we build strength and confidence.  Our personal conflicts shape our character and leave us with a greater appreciation for the gifts we've earned.  You look at those who come from a place of privilege, where life is presented on a silver platter, it's those folks who fail to find meaning in their lives.  Like those lotto winners you hear about, who within a few years of hitting it big are now hitting rock bottom.  I certainly don't want to be beat up everyday but I do want opportunities to present themselves where I can challenge myself and hopefully find a better, stronger version of me on the other side. 

You don't have to crash head first into every challenge that presents itself.  Read Sun Tzu's "Art of War" to get a better understanding of how to do "battle" with those things that confront you every day.  Don't be afraid to jump into the fray and don't worry yourself with the "why's" of life.  Let God handle that.  Just step off and mix it up.  Yeah, these hardships we face from time to time suck but regardless of how those things turn out, it's better to put yourself into the game because they don't give varsity letters to those that sit on the bench.  I know this is coming off as tough talk but mind you I'm no hero by any stretch of the imagination.  I guess the thought of having to live with the fact I backed down from a challenge would hurt more than the bruises I might endure from life's scuffles. 

You're stronger than you know and it's ok to be afraid.  Don't think that makes you less of a person.  All it means is that you understand the gravity of your situation but you'd rather take the risk anyway.  And you know what that is?  Courage! 

Trust...

Trusting is a vital part of our existence.  I understand trust is a difficult thing to do and many of us do it very sparingly.  I'm more apt to be trusting not because I'm a sucker but because an unwillingness to trust only inhibits my ability to grow.  You have to be able to trust in your instincts, to trust in your strengths and to trust in your own resolve.  When you question your abilities and start second-guessing yourself you're taking the first steps towards failure.  More New Years resolutions, goals and commitments fail because we lack the ability to trust ourselves to succeed.

Now trusting in others is another thing.  Trust certainly needs to be earned and you don't want to throw it around willy-nilly.  I'll typically put my trust in someone until they give me a reason not to.   But without question putting your trust in someone is a delicate matter and let's not confuse trust with blindly following circumstance.  You've heard about the women who continually go back to the men that habitually cheat on them, every time saying, "He said he's sorry and I trust him."  Ladies, that has NOTHING to do with trust. Sure there may be a thing or two about him that you truly love but let's be honest here.  You're not really trusting them.  You're just drowning in self-esteem issues that have nothing to do with the neanderthal you're with but everything to do with your lack of self worth.  You're failing to trust in your instincts and your strengths that are screaming at you to move on from this toxic life you're living.

You know trust is the mortar that holds the building blocks of our lives together.  When we lose trust in each other the foundation of our lives and our communities start to disintegrate.  Trust needs to be nurtured and handled with delicate care.  The trust others have in you must be protected and reinforced every day.  We depend on each other and we must be able to trust each other.  We can't live our lives as frightened little children hiding in our rooms.  Trust takes courage.  Don't be afraid to trust.  Yes, it can be intimidating and, yes, there is the possibility you may get hurt, but think of the alternative.  Never being able to trust means never being able to fully live.  Put your trust in others but do so only if they've earned it.  Little nuggets here and there will show you whether or not that person is trustworthy and don't forget trust is a two way street.  When it comes to your friends, family and loved ones, give them a reason to trust YOU.

When trust is an integral part of our shared lives, life becomes more meaningful because "the world has no meaning apart from relationships."  (From the book Cross Roads)

Yeah baby!!!

You know what?  I couldn't care less if Monday's blue.  I'm serious.  And then there's Tuesday, totally gray and Wednesday too.  What the hell!?  And Thursday, you know I REALLY don't care about you.  You know why?  Huh, do ya??  Well I'll tell you.  It's Friday.  Yeah, that's right.  It's frickin' Friday and I'm in love!

Are we starting the weekend yet?  It's Happy Hour somewhere and this work week is done.  Fix, finished and fini!  Time to tell your computer to suck it and put on your play clothes.  Crank up the jams and get this party started, even if you're the only one in attendance cuz you know any party you're at is the best party!  Do something fun or do nothing at all.  Just be the master of your domain.  For the next two days, before they send you back to the salt mines, take charge of your life and go live it.  Live it as if your life depended on it. 

Rock on my fellow inmates.  Time to blow this joint!

Ok, I can do this...

Sifting through a stack of unwanted and some unanticipated bills quickly got me to fretting over my financial predicament and certainly helped to sour my mood.  With the arrival of a horse this spring, two graduations and a wedding, not to mention some family trips sprinkled here and there my ability to figure out financially how to get from here to there is becoming a bit more difficult.  Yeah, when it comes to money it's easy for me to become Baron Von Meisterworry and all I want to do is pull on my jackboots and start kicking someone's ass.  I think it goes back to when I was about five years old and I insisted that my folks show me how to use a checkbook because even at that age I worried about some day having to pay bills and what not.  That first little life lesson planted the seed of angst over finances that blooms every time I sit by the computer to pay my bills.  No matter how much I spout off the power of positive thoughts it's easy for me to slip into that pity party pool of mine.  But you know every month we get by.  Every time I feel like there's no way out there's always a ledge to grasp or a rope to hold onto.  I do need to remind myself that the hardships we face in life are really only opportunities to focus on the here and now.  We shouldn't have to look upon a bad situation with despair, ready to give up.  Instead we just need to pay attention to what's at hand so that those little life preservers that will help us through our dilemma are easy to recognize.  That big, tall, and ominous looking mountain may make me weak in the knees but as long as I concentrate on that next boulder or that next little ledge I'll eventually make my way to the top and the gratification of overcoming my burden will surly outweigh the dread I felt when I started my little adventure. 

Man in the mirror...

So you like to gossip, huh?  Like to put people down behind their backs?  Hey, I'm not here to judge.  If that's your pleasure then by all means indulge yourself.  But if you're looking for a change and really wanting to kick this nasty habit but continue to find yourself in the clutches of this destructive addiction, try this...

For every one bad thing you say about a person, write down three bad things about your.  Now, go into the bathroom, look straight into the mirror, right into your eyes and say those things to back to yourself.

How ya feelin' now? 

Something to contribute...

Ok, I'll admit in my day job it's sometimes difficult to see where I'm making a difference.  Surrounded by a bunch of Sheldon Coopers, feeling very much like Penny's old BF Zack, doesn't really do much for the old self-esteem.  I apologize.  If you don't watch "Big Bang Theory" you won't get the references.  But anyway, hopefully you're picking up on the point that it's hard to feel like you're contributing to something when you kinda feel out of your element.  But fortunately there are times when I can tell that my little donations to the cause do help to some degree.  I suppose I could look elsewhere to find more folks like me but life, both professionally and personally, would be rather dull and predictable if all I knew were like-minded people.  Another reason I'm not into cloning myself. 

Being able to contribute to something means you're able to engage your creative juices in a way that you're helping to produce something of some value.  I think in many respects not feeling like a contributor means we assume we lack any creative opportunities.  I think there are a lot of folks out there that feel deep down inside that they lack any creativity and surrender themselves to the idea that their sole purpose in life is to make it to the end of the day without getting into any significant trouble.   "I can't do this" or "I can't build that" all add to this feeling that we are somehow insignificant, especially compared to others.  Forget what other folks are doing.  Each of us is on our own path and our path is filled with opportunities that are best suited for us and no one else.  Don't get distracted by what's happening elsewhere.  Stay focused on what you have right in front of you. 

You don't have to play a musical instrument, make wicked good cupcakes, be able to carry a tune, paint a portrait, take incredible photographs or author an awe inspiring blog.  You can be creative in an infinite number of ways.  Be creative in how you decide to approach each day.  Be creative in the thoughts you entertain.  Be creative in your behavior.  Be creative in the way you engage people in your life.  You may worry that no one will notice, that there's nothing tangible for you to show off.  On the contrary, what you create of yourself shines more brightly and clearly for others to see, more so than any portrait photo you take or delectable meal you could whip up.  What you create of yourself can be an inspiration to others and what's more gratifying than that?  There is something very special about you and it's just looking for a way to show itself off.  Don't let your surroundings inhibit your desire to create and express.  Let it out!  Your personal canvas is a magnificent landscape of unique beauty, character and experiences that needs to be shared. 

Be your own gallery!